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anger, anxiety, darkness, doubts, encouragement, experience, faith, fears, feelings, God's Humor, God's love, heart, joy, love, mind, obedience, peace, self-will, thought life, true faith, worries
After the Sunset…
(Photo by Susanne Schuberth, colors enhanced by Michael Clark)
Just for clarification, having chosen this particular title, I did not want to suggest that God’s love would not provide a wide range of wonderful feelings, both for our soul and body, that are intrinsic features of an abundant life in Christ (cf. Jn 10:10). Rather, my intention was to point to the fact that our walk with God is often characterized by a lack of good feelings when we find ourselves in another trial where we suffer according to His will. We might also call our walk with Him in these times a mere walk of faith. It is in these times where we learn to trust in what we cannot see (yet) and in what we cannot understand (yet).
Ha! While writing I just had an interesting experience with God I want to share with you.
Today I read a lot of Christian stuff, wondering about what I could write myself. Whether Bible commentaries were concerned, articles by T. Austin Sparks or other blogs I had not known before, eventually, I was so bored that I said, “If I cannot write about my own experiences with You, God, I will drop writing completely.” I recall that I read something about the difference between the mind of Christ versus the mind of the natural man and the unbridgeable gap between flesh and spirit by Sparks. While reading, I would ask God to show me the difference in my mind whenever the old nature went unnoticed by me. In fact, it happened as I wrote the first paragraph above. As soon as I had mentioned ‘suffering’, I wanted to deepen that issue as I often did in the past. After writing another sentence on the long duration of suffering and more, I felt suddenly sooo sad… Since I have known from my own experience that I often write prophetically regarding my own future on my blog and in comments, I felt a big burden on my heart, presuming there was another long period of suffering right ahead of me. I recall how often I wrote about certain issues on here or elsewhere and I would not need to wait very long until God put me to the test. Indeed, I described several trials that happened to me shortly afterwards! Not that I KNEW they would happen, but they did. The funny thing that happened just now was that God interrupted my delving into the depths and duration of suffering by saying, “This is not from me.”
Immediately I saw clearly that my old nature tends to project its fears and anxieties on God and His doing in my life. Therefore, I cannot fully trust Him whenever I walk in darker places (speaking spiritually). After God had given me this seemingly small revelation, my heart leaped with joy. All of a sudden I KNEW (read had faith) that there is an abundant life with love, joy, and peace in circumstances that might look pretty ‘dark’ from the outside when we are attacked by Satan, be that through sicknesses and chronic pain, through enmity by former friends, or even through the death of loved ones. There is a higher level of (eternal) life we can only reach by God’s grace, as always.
Returning to the headline I chose, it refers to our struggle to accept God’s will for our life. As long as we struggle, we can only try to obey Him by surrendering all that we are and all that we are not yet and ask Him to guide us in all, even adverse, circumstances. With God’s help we will see that where there is real agape love, there is always the fruit of the Spirit, too, just as it is written,
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Gal 5:22-23 ESV)
If we obey God by surrendering our thoughts, feelings, and self-will to Him, we prove that we love Him by doing so. Through the whole Bible, even in the Old Testament, we find the close connection between loving God and obeying Him. Jesus said, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” (Jn 14:15 ESV) Later the apostle John goes on to say,
By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. (1 Jn 5:2-4 ESV)
All this negativity of feelings, such as sudden mood changes, doubts, anger, fears, anxieties, and worries are part of our Old Adam nature which belong to this world, still. Above we read that our faith is the key prerequisite of being victorious regarding this ongoing struggle against disobedience, distrust, and discouragement. Actually, His commandments were never meant to be a burden for us! Instead, if we love God, we will be enabled to do everything He wants to see realized in our lives. However, even the love of God must be received (cf. Rom 5:5) before we can obey God out of this same love. Jesus said, “If you love me…” (present tense), “you will keep my commandments” (future tense). His love must dwell in our hearts before we really want to do His will. So, dear brothers and sisters, no hurry with trying to change ourselves, or in other words, no self-salvation projects any more. Just rest in His loving presence because it is all about Christ’s doing in our hearts and minds. Eventually, He will work through us without us even knowing about it. May God help us to get there. Amen.
Entering the Promised Land 
Susanne, it was great to read how Father did not allow you to go down that dark path of fears of new sufferings coming upon your life and showed you that HE is in control of all these things in our lives. After suffering a good part of our lives it is so easy to become morbid about our relationship with God and others and constantly expect, disappointments, suffering and attacks from the enemy and people.
Lately I have been getting wonderfully encouraging comments from my brothers and sisters in Christ on my blog about how God has used the things I and commenters have been sharing to build them up and bring His light into their lives. Each time I start reading a comment that starts out speaking this way to me, I keep waiting for the BUT! “I really love you, brother, but…” Or, “Brother, I am only telling you this because I love you…” When I read a positive comment with terms of endearment, I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, but that has not happened in a long time. I have even found sweet fellowship with you and others, Susanne, and I keep waiting for God to take it away as He seems to have done to me so often in the past. I am sure that this lack of faith that only “good gifts come down to us from the Father of Lights” can be wearing on those who love us, always expecting them to turn against us or fail us.
Paul suffered persecution constantly, but as He rested in God, seeing His love in it all, these things did not constantly grip His mind in a negative way. He saw the positive side of all things both “good and bad” as from the hand of God for Him. Nero might have had him in prison, but Paul only saw himself as a prisoner of Christ who loves him.
We always conquer by focusing on and basking in our Daddy’s love. As I read your quote about the fruit of the Spirit, it occurred to me that suffering and rejection were not in that list! 🙂 Suffering, rejection, persecution, etc. are used by God to bring forth hearts in us in which the fruit of the Spirit might abound!
Thank you, dear sister, for all the wonderful things that you share and letting His light shine through you in such sweet fellowship,
Michael ⭐ 🐻
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Thank you, too, for this sweet fellowship, for sharing your wisdom, and for writing such an excellent comment! I agree with everything you said, my brother! ⭐
And now I am afraid I must go to bed… Paul is done with his stargazing stuff and just said, “Good Night!” 🙂
Your eternal friend and sister in Him,
Susanne 🐱
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Susanne, thank you for your appreciative reply. I hope you had a good night’s sleep and awoke refreshed in the love of Jesus for you. I am looking forward to what else the Spirit shares with you. ⭐
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You are very welcome, Michael. Sleep was okay, Jesus is here, but back pains, too. Am right now on my weekly big shopping tour with Paul who must help me carry all that stuff! 😥😊
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Strange, but I awoke with back pains and minor mussel spasms, myself. “When one member of the body suffers, all members suffer”? I am glad that Paul is helping you with your shopping. I plan on taking it easy today, but we have a big snow storm heading our way this weekend, so there will be lots of shoveling and plowing to do.
I will be praying for your back, dear sister.
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Oh boy, I will be praying for your back, too, Michael! Thanks a lot for your prayers, my dear brother! ⭐
I wonder whether this Scripture you mentioned included having the same physical pains like another member of the Body of Christ at the same time?
Sorry to hear that another blizzard might come close to you and Dot. Hopefully, if there is much new snow, you can use the ATV and do not need to do that much shoveling which might hurt you back again. Or could Dean help you out, perhaps? 🙄
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Susanne, you are welcome to my prayers. Thank you for yours, too!
I think that suffering in the New Covenant as members one of another is a mystery. When we are connected IN Christ we can truly say, “I feel your pain” and we can truly rejoice when another member rejoices. Paul wrote,
“If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.” (2Cor 1:6-7, ESV2011)
Just as Father has connected us to Himself IN Christ, so is it that where two members of His body are connected to Him as our Head, so are they connected to one another. It is His great love for one another in our pains that keeps us in prayer, lifting one another up before the throne of grace.
Don’t worry about the snow. We will find a way to avoid most of the shoveling. 🙂
Praying for you! ⭐
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I think this is the best answer possible, Michael. You said, “I think that suffering in the New Covenant as members one of another is a mystery.”
Indeed, it is a mystery to me, still. I know I feel empathy when someone suffers mentally. But sharing the same physical pains with someone, that seems to be quite strange to me. Maybe, “strange” because it reminds me of these many Catholic saints of whom it is stated that they had received the stigmata of Jesus. This legend is based on what apostle Paul said as you most certainly know, my brother.
“From now on let no one cause me trouble, for I bear on my body the marks of Jesus.” (Gal 6:17 ESV)
Okay, okay, I stop worrying about the snow, but I keep praying for our backs. 🙂
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I am not entirely sure I agree with the way you’ve stated this. Yes, we obey God out of love. That may not always “feel” to us like love, in the moment — not warm and cozy while we are still suffering, any more than forgiveness is warm and cozy while our wounds are still bleeding.
But to obey God without love is legalism. Isn’t it? Am I wrong?
Love,
A. ❤
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Good question, Anna. You wrote, “But to obey God without love is legalism. Isn’t it?”
Yes, I agree with you. Maybe, I should have clarified that our feelings while suffering might lead us to a(n) I-do-not-want-to-obey-God-attitude while our spirit finally submits to Him in spite of our painful feelings. But even for this submission we need God’s help. For me, Jesus was the best example. We know He loved God and he surely was no legalist. But when He prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane, there was a hard struggle going on between His human flesh and its desire to escape this horrible death and His soul and spirit that needed to be uplifted and strengthened by God, as He prayed,
“Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.” And there appeared to him an angel from heaven, strengthening him. And being in agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground. (Lk 22:42-44 ESV)
I believe what you wrote about forgiveness is true as well as I thought about the unspeakable pain Jesus must have felt on the cross in his body AND soul while He was able to say, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” (Lk 23:34 ESV)
Thanks for your very helpful input, dear Anna! ⭐
Much love ❤ ❤ ❤
Susanne
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You know, we do not realize how much children absorb from us.
My grandmother was a deeply religious woman. She would regularly listen to radio preachers. I remember lying in bed as a little girl, while the grown-ups in the next room had the radio playing. I can still remember hearing the phrases “The Lord make His face shine upon you” and “For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever and ever”. Before I understood them, they stayed w/ me.
Anyhow, we had a picture of the Agony in the Garden hanging in our living room. The pain on Christ’s face was something even a child could understand.
Thank you for your explanation, Susanne.
Much love,
A. ❤ ❤ ❤
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You’re very welcome as to the explanation, dear Anna. 🙂
I assume it was not that easy for you and your sister to look at this picture, particularly as children. As for me, I recall when I was sitting in the RCC as a little girl, I felt always ‘forced’ to look at this very tall and pale young man who was hanging half-naked on a huge wooden cross, looking at you as if he was alive. I often wondered why I was so intrigued by the look into his eyes. What made me sad was to see the nails in his feet and hands and that his face was bleeding due to the crown of thornes. The artist who created this piece of art truly knew what he did regarding Jesus’ eyes and looks! In order to show you what I mean, I was just searching for a picture of St. Mary’s Church in Hof (Bavaria) where you might perceive this ‘illusion’ a bit (although I found no bigger picture). Btw, I was always sitting on the front left side so that I could really look into His eyes. 😉
Marienkirche Hof/Saale
What I liked in this church was the fact that Jesus was higher elevated than Mary which is not usual in RC churches. It reminds me of Him saying that He would draw all men to Himself when He was lifted up (Jn 12:32).
More about childhood… My mom always prayed with me and listened to radio sermons (Catholic, Protestant, Pentecostal,….) in the kitchen while my grandmom silently went to a Protestant church and seemed to have read a bunch of small tractates about Jesus. Indeed, both influenced me greatly and I am thankful they did! They made me more than curious about how HE might really be.
Love you, my sister! ❤
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Susanne, thank you for the blog, the comments, and replies. I had not seen the term: self-salvation projects, before but I laughed when I read it. I laughed because it communicated so much.
Michael’s reply communicated much also. With me, any positive comment, brings a sudden fear that something bad will follow.
I believe that love is obedience. I pray that God will deliver us from fear that a good feeling is not trust worthy. A good feeling is transitory, but not evil.
I love you, precious sister.
Pat Orr
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Mmmhhh…… That was a sweet comment by you, dear Pat. ❤ Thank you so much for writing! 🙂
When you are not online for a while or only write short comments, I often wonder whether you might not be doing well (physically) and pray. Therefore I am very happy to see you back on here, too! 🙂
You are most welcome as to the blog, my dear sister. Yes, Michael’s contribution was very helpful for me as well. I also know this certain anxiety he, and now you, spoke of. Might have to do with eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil…? Not sure, maybe, Michael could weigh in here…?
Self-salvation projects? You’re right, Pat, SSP might be another newly coined word by me. 😉 I think I used it a few times before, but if no one objects I forget that I was the author of something which does not really exist in the English language. XD By the way, I do such things in German, too, and drive those around me nuts by doing so. But it’s real fun for me! 🙂
I love you, too, dear Pat! You are a treasure from God for me! ⭐ ⭐ ⭐
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It is good to hear from you, Pat. I can say, “Ditto” to everything that Susanne said to you. You are a blessing to us.
As for the reason for me always waiting for a negative comment to follow any praise or gratitude that comes my way, well, that is what I was raised with. My parents never gave a word of praise without the BUT following. Then when I got involved in churches it was the same way for the most part, the more “spiritual” they were, the more the tree of knowledge of good and evil prevailed. The worse part of it was that with so much of this attitude surrounding my life, I tended to do the same thing with others as well. I have had much to repent of as God has showed me His unconditional love directly and through His dear saints.
Love to you both,
Michael
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Love to you, too, Michael. ❤
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Yea Sue our feelings can sway in many directions and what I have come to understand is that obey means to listen under–we listen to what Father prompts us to do and even though our feelings may be out of line with His advice we do as He leads and what do we get? PEACE.
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Amen, Ken! If we follow His leading, we will always get His PEACE. Since this happened to me just a few minutes ago, your comment has been a wonderful confirmation for me, my brother.
Thanks for writing THIS! 🙂
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PEACE SISTER!
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Peace to you, too, brother! 🙂
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Dear Susanne,
I identify completely with what you’ve shared in this post – I had an experience last week that trully tested the aspect of love for God and obedience: walking home at a stretch that has become precious to me as I use it for prayer walk, I senced the need to call a brother I had promised to do something for, but had failed to fulfill within the promised time. It was a choise between what I have been accustomed to and feels right and the very loud and clear leading to make the call. It was a very uncomfortable call to make, but I knew it was the right thing to do at that particular time. I thank God He enabled me to obey, as there was lots of peace after the call and was able to continue with my usual in the spirit of, Matthew 5:23-25.
Further, please allow me to appreciate your sharing here – I am a keen reader of your posts and related comments, even though I do not comment as much.
Our Lord bless you and your service to His bride.
Patrick
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Dear Patrick,
Oh, what an exactly fitting example you shared with us on here! How wonderful that you listened to God and made that call in spite of your feelings. I love the humbleness with which you admit that it was God who would enable you to obey Him. Regarding Matthew 5:23-25… well, I imagine it was VERY difficult to make that call. I had a few similar experiences as well (writing a letter of apology, for instance). If I do not obey, I know that God won’t let me rest in His presence any longer until I have obeyed. And then, as you so rightly confirmed, His peace follows somehow automatically.
Even if you do not have as much time to comment as others have, I highly appreciate your input, dear brother. Thanks for taking the time to share you wisdom with me!
May God bless you and yours with every divine blessing imaginable,
Your sister Susanne
Thank you so much for your encouraging contribution on here! 🙂 My spirit has been edified to hear that you appreciate both blogs and comments on Entering the Promised Land.
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