Susanne Schuberth’s Spiritual Diary (Part 4) – “A Dream Come True…”

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anxiety, church, depression, dreams, experience, family, fears, fellowship, freedom, interpretation, John of the Cross, joy, Michael Clark, my journal, prayer, suicide, the dark night of the spirit, visions

“GRACE behind the fence…” (number five represents GRACE)
Photo by Susanne Schuberth

Well, seven years ago, as I was still all alone in my walk with Daddy and Jesus, I was plagued by several fears. At that time, it was not that clear to me what the root of these fears was. As I know today, it was the fear of death, not of my own death since I had a wonderful NDE (near death experience) in 1998, but of losing my loved ones (parents, daughter, husband… you get the picture). After having already lost our only son through a miscarriage in 2009, these fears kept coming back much stronger than before, again and again. I have been pretty anxious all my life, however, during the Dark Night of the Spirit (see John of the Cross’ same-titled book) that began in 2010, it got worse and worse, i.e., God began to open the deep recesses of my heart so that I could both see AND feel these fears – extremely!!!

How to Become ONE

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becoming one, discerning the spirits, exhortation, experience, faith, feelings, God's love, heart, love, obedience, Oneness, sanctification, Satan, sin, soul-life, the valley of the shadow of death

If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. (1 Jn 4:20 ESV)
– Photo by Susanne Schuberth

We have an easy time dealing with people who perfectly agree with us and always understand what we mean. Ahem, ahem, seriously… do such people really exist??  😉 Is there anyone but God who understands everything we might tell them and knows these dark and hidden areas inside our hearts we do not even know ourselves? I assume we all might feel more comfortable with those people who agree with us or who appreciate us even if we disagree. Yet it appears to be more difficult when we have to do with human beings who like to debate or fight over who is right. God who knows our problems created a heavenly condition of which Jesus spoke as He prayed,

Prayerlessness profits nothing

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darkness, discerning the spirits, exhortation, experience, following Jesus, God's love, Jesus Christ, light, Martin Luther, Michael Clark, prayer, Satan, T.A. Sparks, walking by the spirit

Impressions from snowless Fürth/Bavaria in December 2016
(Photo by Susanne Schuberth)

After midnight and just before going to bed I often read T. Austin Sparks’ daily devotional. Sometimes his words strike me so that I need to copy and paste them, knowing that might turn out another blog article, although I rarely know what I am going to write about in detail. From my own experiences, I can confirm that these days when I am hindered through people, pain or problems to spend more time alone with God than usual (i.e., two or three times a day), my mental condition is not the best. I am more vulnerable, impatient, more easily discouraged and I am easily stressed out as well. Also, it is more difficult for me to discern God’s voice from others AND to finally obey His leading, too.

“Who are our Brethren?” Some Thoughts on The Final Judgment

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carnal mind, discerning the spirits, experience, following Jesus, Life and Death, Michael Clark, spirit and life, spiritual mind

“But let judgment run down as waters, and righteousness as a mighty stream.” (Amos 5:24 KJV) – Photo by Susanne Schuberth

If you, like me, were raised in the RCC, and even more so, in liberal circles, you might have heard the statement that all people on earth have eventually become our brothers and sisters because of Christ. But is that true? Also, are all Christians automatically His sheep who will find themselves on that very day of the Final Judgment on Christ’s right side? Let’s read the whole story in its context.

Sin does not equal sin or… God only judges the heart

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discerning the spirits, exhortation, experience, forgiveness, grace, heart, judging others, light, rest, sin, truth

Fall Has Come…
(Photo by Susanne Schuberth)

While typing the headline, I myself just wondered about the wording of this title. You and I know what sin is when we read or talk about it, however, is it possible that there are differences of motives when we fall in sin? I was just thinking about the Pharisees who by condemning a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery basically did no wrong thing according to their own law as they wanted to stone her. The Jews indeed had the right to judge those who belonged to them, just as they had no right to do so with others who were no Jews like the Gentiles. But here stood Jesus who represented the end of the Old Covenant, the end of the law for all those who believe in Him (cf. Rom 10:4). He alone was the One who could show grace to this poor woman “for the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ” (Jn 1:17 ESV)

Get Thee Out… and move on

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darkness, discerning the spirits, dying to self, experience, following Jesus, God's love, intimacy, joy, light, Michael Clark, pain, resisting temptation, suffering, the new self, the old self

 

“For the LORD thy God is a consuming fire, even a jealous God.” (Dt 4:24 KJV) – Photo by Susanne Schuberth

I do not know as yet what this blog post will turn out like and I need to admit it is a pretty hard one for me. So I prayed to the Lord that He might help me by adding His wisdom and thoughts on what He has been teaching me during the last few weeks.

LOVE is YOU

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discerning the spirits, encouragement, experience, God's love, intimacy, life, light, love, Michael Clark, sanctification, the dark night of the soul, the dark night of the spirit, the Kingdom of God, the new self, the old self

After sunrise in the Public Pool (Fürth/Scherbsgraben)
Photo by Susanne Schuberth

After a pretty long and dry period without much inspiration, here is another joint article by Michael Clark and me.

Satan is a liar. And he is very good at that. He tells us to worry about tomorrow because God would not care or provide. Therefore, we fear the future although we might know there are Scriptures which promise the opposite of what the devil keeps whispering into our ears. If we are tempted to sin, our enemy embellishes the act of sinning and plays the consequences down by offering us only good feelings that should make us fall asleep spiritually. And what is worst, Satan tries to convince us that God could NEVER give us what he, Satan, offers. Instead, he presents God as a someone who would take everything from us which would, if we listened to the devil, make our life worthwhile (I am mainly referring to sin here). Although we might spell out the appropriate Bible verses to the angel of light, he will only laugh at us, knowing that our natural heart is terribly wicked and inclined to commit every sin imaginable if the right conditions were presented to us.

How to Break free from Delusion and Deception

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deceitfulness of the heart, deception, delusion, discerning the spirits, entering his rest, exhortation, experience, false prophets, God's love, Jesus Christ, Satan, sin, spiritual growth, T.A. Sparks

“For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water.” (Jer 2:13 ESV)
– Photo by Susanne Schuberth

Below you can read a definition of what the word ‘delusion’ basically signifies. T. Austin Sparks explained it this way.

What is delusion? Well, it is to lead from truth into error. It is to mislead the mind or the judgment, to beguile, to lead astray, to cheat, to frustrate, to disappoint, to impose upon; something that is not the truth; and these are days peculiarly marked by that peril. [1]

Actually, delusion and deception are so natural to us that we usually submit to them without knowing about it until God sets us free. On the one hand, there are people who are atheists or agnostics who are deceived because they reject The Truth which is Christ. On the other hand, there are religious people, even Christians, who are deceived because they are content with what they know and can do for God or other religious entities. These believers do not want to grow spiritually because it is too painful for the flesh which must die and make room for Christ in us. Furthermore, there are Christians who have come to know parts of the truth and who had their personal experiences with God and Christ too, however, they habitually eat the whole meat of everything they were taught and do not spit out the bones. Thus it is often times a horrible mix of truth and lies they offer and you need to be cautious to not get captivated by their confusing spiritual spider webs as well.

On how to discern the Antichrist or… The Body without its Head is dead

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anointing, church, deception, discerning the spirits, experience, following Jesus, R.C. Sproul, Satan, T.A. Sparks, The Bride of Christ, wisdom

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. (Ps 1:1-3 ESV)
– Photo by Susanne Schuberth

Asking myself of what, or rather of who, the real Church of God might consist, I recently found a both simple and striking observation by T. Austin Sparks who said,

“The church has no existence in the thought of God apart from the revelation of Jesus Christ, and it is judged according to the measure in which Christ the Son of God’s love is in evidence by its existence.” [1]

Every institution, house church gathering, or theological conference that replaces His name and leading with their own ideas is not The Bride of Christ. Instead, it is indeed an epitome of the antichrist. Two years ago I felt urged to write a poem on this very issue where I called these inventions of the devil “the whore” of Satan. [2] Even before starting to write these verses, I sensed a very strong anointing to do so while I was driven by the fear of God to call a spade a spade. As we know especially from the Old Testament, God does not mince His words. And as we see in the New Testament, Jesus who is The Word of God offended several people by telling them the truth. [3] Not only the Pharisees and scribes received lessons regarding self-knowledge; even His disciples stumbled time and again over His hard words so that many of them eventually left Him as we can read in the following passage.

Awakened to a New Life… IN Christ

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awakened, being born again, darkness, discerning the spirits, encouragement, eternal life, exhortation, experience, experiencing eternal life, fellowship, Fellowship with God, God's love, Jesus Christ, light, Oneness, Paul Schuberth, Satan, sin, T.A. Sparks, the new self, the old self

“Bring me a worm that can comprehend a man, and then I will show you a man that can comprehend the Triune God.” – John Wesley
(Photo by Susanne Schuberth)

This is not a new post. I put this article as a featured blog entry before all others on my home page since after rereading, I just found out that this writing expresses now, more than one year later, a lot of what I have been going through since then. As for publishing new and inspired blog posts, I will have to wait for Him to inspire me once again in the days ahead, whenever that may be. 😉

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Lately I began to wonder when this seemingly endless process of dying to self finally would be over. To be completely honest with you, I had given up any hope of ever seeing His light again, just as the apostle Paul said here, “… we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.” (2 Cor 1:8-9 ESV) Just now as I checked the context of these verses, I saw some encouragement I unintentionally had ignored before. Paul wrote there,