After many years full of struggles, fears, doubts, pain, and suffering, I discovered, once again, that God can always be trusted. He keeps His promises even if we can hardly believe them during our darkest times. There were several times when we as a family thought that we would lose our daughter as her life was at stake. But God eventually saved her and pulled her close to His heart. I have been humbled by His wondrous ways of dealing with us little human beings again and I am thankful beyond measure!
Yesterday in the evening I really felt I wanted to write a new poem after almost four years of inspirational inactivity as to this very issue. Yet I was sooo tired (zzzzzzzzzzzz) and thus I took a ‘prayer nap’ instead. However, I felt a particular word reverberating in my mind. It was, “YOU…..YOU…..YOU…..” – “That would be a very short poem, my Lord, indeed!” I thought. 😉
It was only a few hours later as our daughter sent me a screenshot via WhatsApp. She told me that she felt ‘nudged’ to write a poem. Her first word was…. of course…. YOU. 🙂 Although the poem was written in German, I decided to translate it quickly, not yet sure whether to publish it or not. Today in the afternoon I suddenly felt inspired to keep writing a poem, surrounding hers, myself. If you are interested, here you are.
controlling spirits, discerning the spirits, experience, family, fellowship, Fellowship of His Sufferings, following Jesus, Jesus Christ, manipulative spirits, Michael Clark, Resisting the Devil, resurrection power, spiritual experience, spiritual power, Testimony, the law
Maybe, you like me, have come to know difficult people. Maybe, even VERY difficult people. Perhaps, these people were not only strangers, neighbors or friends. Well, you might have had to deal with difficult loved ones for years or even decades. As much as we should love our enemies when they attack us, speak evil of us, yeah, persecute us because we follow Christ, in the same way we ought to be cautious to listen to God’s leading when we are confronted with such persons.
It is not helpful to always blame ourselves for not being able to love them as we think we should. Sometimes, instead, we need to take a stand and resist the devil who drives them. If we submit to a controlling and manipulative spirit in others, we cannot follow the Lord just the same. In such cases Satan is allowed to make us angry, upset, resentful and… we are hurting at that! Yet, is all this pain really necessary, i.e., has it all been part of God’s plan for us? Or was it rather the devil who knows the full range of how to destroy our God-given peace through any kind of dead works of the flesh? 🤔
I really enjoyed reading Patrick Maina’s compassionate blog on how a friend of him became a tool to extend God’s love and grace to his wife. It is always encouraging for me to read about Christians who truly listen to Jesus’ voice! 🙂
Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. (John 15:13)
The moment I saw Josh walk through the gate, I knew there was something terribly wrong. It did not take him more than five steps before breaking down in tears , proving my suspicion right. I had to run to support him from his staggering walk. As awkward as it felt at first, I found myself providing a shoulder for him to cry on.
African men are not supposed to cry, but Josh was no typical man. He had his stack of stories for his atypical life. Even then, it was the first time to see him cry and I could only try and fill up for myself what could have happened – he just kept mumbling words in the line of, “ndugu yangu, kwa nini haya? (my brother, why these?)”
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I know it’s been a while since I published the last blog article (five months, oh well). Even just yesterday I was wondering whether I would be done with writing publicly as I have felt NO inclination to jot down my experiences with God for a rather long time. No time and no interest in blogging at all! Furthermore, I have experienced a very dry spiritual “blah time”. You know, these times when everything seems to be so “normal”, so arduous and boring that you might wonder whether you had known God at all. 🙄
Strange… during the last two or three weeks I thought about writing another blog, but I was either too busy with visiting our family members who live scattered in Bavaria or I felt no inclination to start writing on the computer because of summer time. Many plants (about 130) on our two balconies and inside our flat need to be cared for, too. Honestly, I like gardening more than being on the internet and swimming in the outdoor public pool (s. picture above) was more attractive to me as well. It is only in water when several body pains disappear and therefore I swam more than I walked lately. 😉 In Germany we experienced a first heat wave in April, which was VERY unusual, and it seemed hot summer did not want to take a break in May, either. Eventually, today it began to rain a bit which has been much needed by nature and so I sat down in front of the computer, wondering what I was doing here. 🙄 Again, no inclination to write. As I checked the latest file on my thumb drive which is called “New Post”, I saw that I had written this very thing beneath on May 25th already. Forgetful Susanne! 😊 So, now here you are… the rest of it at least… which means I deleted some details that did not speak to me today any more.
being born again, called by God, devotion, entering the Kingdom of God, experience, fame, family, following Jesus, friends, Humility, humor, Jesus Christ, miracles, Ordinary Life, Oswald Chambers, relationships, revelation, sanctification, servanthood, success, the new self, the old self, walking by the spirit
Just reading Oswald Chambers’ devotional from tomorrow, I was truly hit by what he had to say. I need to admit that it does not happen very often that I appreciate his devotionals because I do not like his sometimes accusatory style of writing (preaching). I am paraphrasing him here a bit, “Do you think you have already arrived? Are you sure you belong to the Lord Jesus? You should not do this … you should not do that… you [seem to do it all wrong – the latter were my words].” This posture reminds me of preachers on the pulpit who seemingly dwell in another, higher spiritual region than their more or less attentive audience does. If we compare such accusations with how often the apostle Paul humbled himself before other, less mature Christians, we might know where and when we must be cautious about believing what we hear or read from other people. Nonetheless, I can tell you whenever Chambers goes over to including himself into what he has to say, I am happy! Lo and behold… below. 😊
anxiety, church, depression, dreams, experience, family, fears, fellowship, freedom, interpretation, John of the Cross, joy, Michael Clark, my journal, prayer, suicide, the dark night of the spirit, visions
Well, seven years ago, as I was still all alone in my walk with Daddy and Jesus, I was plagued by several fears. At that time, it was not that clear to me what the root of these fears was. As I know today, it was the fear of death, not of my own death since I had a wonderful NDE (near death experience) in 1998, but of losing my loved ones (parents, daughter, husband… you get the picture). After having already lost our only son through a miscarriage in 2009, these fears kept coming back much stronger than before, again and again. I have been pretty anxious all my life, however, during the Dark Night of the Spirit (see John of the Cross’ same-titled book) that began in 2010, it got worse and worse, i.e., God began to open the deep recesses of my heart so that I could both see AND feel these fears – extremely!!!
death, decisions, discerning the spirits, dying to self, eternal life, exhortation, experience, family, freedom, friends, grace, idolatry, joy, life, loved ones, new creation, old creation, pain, peace, suffering, T.A. Sparks, unbelief, walking by the spirit
God spoke to me a few minutes ago through the following Scriptures. He made them alive particularly by emphasizing the word TODAY. You can read this word five times in these verses. As many might know, five is the number that stands for GRACE. Just to give you a few hints as for the context in which God spoke to me, I can tell you that I had a struggle regarding a decision on how to react (or not) to someone’s misbehavior that put them in more or less big trouble. If you love someone, you might know how difficult it is to not intervene when you see things go downhill. So, my heart was very troubled about this trial as God pointed out to me that NOW it was my choice to turn to Him and to obey Him instead of trying to ‘save’ someone I love. If I obeyed Him, all things would turn out well, He said. Below you can read the Bible verses that reached my heart and comforted me immediately.