Tags
anger, experience, frustration, God's love, heart, honesty, intimacy, real love, relationship with God
Following the suggestion of a dear sister, I began to write blank-mindedly as usual another article of which I now only have the very next paragraph that was part of a comment I had written on her blog.
“So many think because they believe in Jesus, they are automatically indwelt by the Holy Spirit and would be able to do what Jesus did (love their enemies, for instance). However, it needs a very long time and countless anointings of His Spirit until we can love more and more people in more and more difficult situations. If there is no love in our hearts, then there is none, and we need to wait until the Holy Spirit fills us up to the brim.”
Just today I talked with someone who admitted that he was not able to love a woman who had often attacked him in the past decades. He said that he knew it was not “Christianlike” as he now decided to avoid her in the future and, maybe, he would change his mind any time later, yet currently he could not deal differently with her. Knowing that woman myself, I do know she has her issues as well and I understand both of them. Well, indeed, such are situations in which we might find ourselves again and again. Nobody of us is able to keep the law of Christ’s unconditional love and to only decide with his mind that he will be loving and kind toward everyone. I recall how often I was disappointed and discouraged when I found myself in that trap again, that is, when I had assumed I could behave differently toward particular persons, yet time and again, although I might have pulled myself together, I could clearly feel that I had the same negative attitude in my heart despite “better behavior”.
Indeed, God is not interested in our “pulling ourselves together”, especially when we draw near to Him. If I do not love God, I do not love God. Period. And if I cannot love my neighbor, I won’t ever be able to do so. Period again. The difficulties and trials begin when we try to solve such problems on our own by simply changing our behavior. Okay, okay, we might have prayed to God beforehand that He would change our hearts, and we might have hoped to turn out as a perfect saint in the twinkling of an eye. However, that is not what spiritual life is all about. Rome wasn’t built in a day, either, was it… 😉 The most important thing to me is that God loves me unconditionally and that I may tell Him whatever pops up in my mind. Although I do not understand it, I know and feel that He loves it when I am completely honest in every given situation. If I am mad at Him because He did not give me an answer as quickly as I had expected it, I tell Him about it. And I feel His peace. If I am mad at Him because I received a new revelation which He seemingly took away a few moments later, I complain about it. And I feel His peace. If He decides to change my circumstances so that I have more problems than ever, I pour my heart out before Him without any restriction. And, as you would have guessed, I feel His deep peace, and love (!), while doing so.
My brothers and sisters, that is what real love and intimacy with God is all about. We can be who we are! There is no natural necessity to wear a holy mask with the label “I am a loving Christian” on it. Actually, I have realized that God slowly enables me to love more and more people after hundreds (!!!) of anointings during the last 9 months. I had such experiences when He put His light and love into me often times before, but meanwhile those anointings happened so often that I cannot count them anymore. Nevertheless, although I see that there are more people I can understand and love, I still have my problems with particular persons and I do not know how to deal with them yet. Hopefully, after thousands of anointings by the Holy Spirit, things will get a bit better, still… 😉
Image © Susanne Schuberth 2021
Michael said:
Thank you, Susanne. I love the way you are so honest with how you feel about the way God is dealing with you when you pray. There is a childlike faith in you that inspires me. I have found in my own dealings with people that are hard to live with that the best prayer for me is, “Lord, let me see them as YOU see them and give me YOUR love for them.” And He does. Or in a particular situation, “Father, help me to see and believe that even this situation will be used by you to draw me closer to you and open my eyes to see your transforming grace in it.”
The older I get the more I have found this passage to be true,
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.” (Romans 8:28-29 KJVCNT)
Bless you, my sister!
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Thank you very much for your encouraging words, dear Michael. 🙂
Actually, I am not so sure whether I always “love” my honesty toward God, yet as soon as I find myself trying to “behave better before Him”, I sense that He assures me about loving me just as the way I am.
Yours are very wise prayers, Michael. In fact, we always need His love to love those who behave unlovable toward us. Our natural human love would not be enough to see them through it all. Loving our enemies is the final goal, and without His unconditional love, we could never reach it.
Yes and amen to that Scripture, too. It is often hard to accept, but bad circumstances are truly meant for our (spiritual) good which we often only realize a long time afterwards.
Every blessing to you, my brother!
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Ha again! 😀
Es freut mich sehr das zu hören! 😉
[English: I am very pleased to hear that! 😉 ]
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Yup, same track, for sure! 🙂
BTW, three hearts could stand for the love of the Trinity…
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Ken Burgess said:
Susanne, thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my American Indian heart. This article pricked my heart in a way that has not happened in a long, long time. I am guilty of trying to, “behave better toward HiM,” or say what I want I think He wants to hear. Before I finished reading this I was weeping and repenting for being so dishonest with HiM. I told something I can’t ever remember telling HiM. Father, I am angry with you for…and I named several things including an incident with a family member today. I wasn’t very loving toward her. I can’t say I “feel” HiS peace but that’s ok. I know He will love me no matter what, and isn’t looking for reasons to smack me or to with hold HiS love and blessings. So my precious sister, thank you again for your transparency and candor. In HiM, CHRkenIST
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Oh, Ken, you’re so welcome. 🙂 I was very glad to hear that this short article has helped you a bit and I was very touched by reading your very honest words on here.
I admit that I myself have struggled for a very long time with being completely honest with God as well, but finally he got me. I wrote several blog posts about my “brutal” honesty 😉 with Him already and I think I could link to one of them here for you. If you like to read that part in which I describe my dialogues with Him, too, see https://enteringthepromisedland.wordpress.com/2014/12/27/susanne-schuberths-spiritual-diary-part-2-when-i-was-biking/.
In His love,
Susanne
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Kenneth Dawson said:
Your article about honesty was very fitting–just a little while ago I was reading John chapter three and in the ending section of chapter two it is stated how Jesus knew the untrustworthiness of humanity…then in chapter three it is said…now there was a man named Nicodemus and I love the honesty that he spoke with Jesus and as a result he had the real gospel preached to him and in the long run it is evident the Nico got saved–most assuredly it pays to be honest with God.
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Dear Kenneth,
That was I great observation you made here. I never thought about that way regarding Nicodemus before. And you are right; at first sight one might wonder why notable Nico 😉 dared to be that open with Jesus while others rather hid behind their mere outward piety… But I too believe that he got saved later, for sure!!
Thanks so much for your inspiring input, my brother! 🙂
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Michael said:
Kenneth, thanks for the reminder that the original text did not have chapter breaks in it and thus the end of chapter two goes with the beginning of three. It was Jesus distrust for the human element that gave Him the wisdom to speak beyond it and get right to the heart of the matter… speaking to hearts instead of to their heads, as He did with Nicodemus. There are some great lessons to be learned here for sure.
Lord, give us such wisdom and love to speak to men’s hearts instead of being pulled into their head trips with them. Amen
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josephbelovedinhiseyes said:
I have also struggled with this in the past but I kept asking God to give me the ability to LOVE one another, especially the folks who have hurt me in the past, and to LOVE God as He loves us. Like a persistent widow, I kept on asking and asking. I think over time God has been dripping His sweet love into my empty vessel.
I have been practicing loving one another starting with one small action at a time. I remember I read an interesting marriage advice somewhere (which also could be applied to other folks), it went something like this – “What can I do to make his/her day better?” They emphasized it’s the little things we do on a daily basis that makes a difference! I definitely took the advice to heart.
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Hi Joseph,
Indeed, that was great advice you shared on here, emphasizing the little things we could do daily. Thank you for your wise input! 🙂
Yes, if we keep asking Him, He will drip His sweet love deeper and deeper into those vessels who have been emptied of their old selfish nature. Yet it is a long way, isn’t it? The deeper the wounds in our hearts, the longer the process might be…
Warm regards,
Susanne
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jacqui said:
Reblogged this on Touching the King.
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Hahaha! 😀
Just commented on your reblog too – at the same time – funny!!! 🙂
You’re most welcome, dear Jacqui! ❤
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Wow, my dear Jacqui! ❤ That was sooo encouraging to read for me! Thanks a million for your kind words!!! 😀
I believe as long as there is only one person in my mind of who I can think without feeling overwhelmed by compassion and love for them, I am not yet through it all. So, lets keep struggling together, that is, lets keep running to Him who has the cure in His hands and who makes us love as God loves. Thank you too for your honesty, my sweet sister! ❤ ❤ ❤
Bless you, Jacqui!
Susanne xx
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Ha! You had German in college, too? Wow!! 😀
And your son studied in Germany as far as I remember…?
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Anna Waldherr said:
I agree entirely that developing the capacity to love one’s neighbor is a process. I think of the all too frequent times I’ve failed at it as “Christian moments” (impatient with a telemarketer, for instance). The phrase is meant ironically, of course. But the issue is more profound. How do we forgive the unforgivable? Only with God’s help, I think. What, for instance, would justice dictate as a fit sentence for the Boston Marathon bomber? Life imprisonment? Death? Amputation? In truth, we cannot render perfect justice here on earth. We can only trust that God will do what we — within the limits of time and space — cannot.
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Dear Anna ❤
As you mentioned the telemarketer, I could only sigh….. Feeeeew…. it is truly difficult to be patient with them. 😛 Meanwhile I tell them that I am not interested in whatever they want to share, say, or sell….and if they ignore my objections and go on with their usual blah blah, I hang up immediately. Feels much better than listening to their stuff and being impatient inside my heart all the time.
Forgiving the unforgivable… Yes, that works ONLY with God’s help, I am sure. Also, I think we cannot render perfect justice to anyone because we do not see their hearts as God does. Nonetheless, I am convinced that our God does not overlook any injustice on earth. If there is no repentance, His judgment is clear.
Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.
And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil.
For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.
But whoever does what is true comes to the light, so that it may be clearly seen that his works have been carried out in God. (Jn 3:18-21 ESV)
Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him. (Jn 3:36 ESV)
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Wow!! Where did you find that English translation, Michael? It sounds very good although it is a rather “free” translation, not a very literal one. But the gist of it all comes through.
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Michael said:
Susanne, I looked for the exact translation I shared here but did not find it again. But this blog has a similar one. http://flowerheini.blogspot.com/
Here is another site with many of His poems translated into English, but not this one.
How would you translate H. H.’s poem? It is really pretty. I looked at many of his other poems and he seemed heartbroken and lonely… almost morose… as it is with so many artists inspired by human love it would seem. I thank God we have been given His agape love and a new heart, don’t you?
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Yes, Michael, agape love and a new heart is the only thing that can save us from despair and hopelessness due to unforeseen adverse circumstances of fate, and I, too, am so grateful for God’s gifts of grace.
I will check out the link as soon as I have the time to do so and maybe post my ideas on translating at least two verses of that poem a bit differently. God willing, as always! 🙂
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
I am glad to hear that you and Pat sing hymns together. What a wonderful gift from God to you both! 🙂
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
You’re very welcome, my dear brother! 🙂
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Michael said:
Susanne, I am glad that you do not fill cyber-space with uninspired blog entries just to keep yourself in the public eye as so many bloggers do. We know that unless God builds the house, they who build it labor in vain. Jesus so aptly put it, “Every plant that my Father has not planted shall be rooted up.” Even the most inspired writers have times when God is just not speaking to them, but instead calls them to rest. Israel never seemed to learn that lesson,
“For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel: In returning [to Me] and resting [in Me] you shall be saved; in quietness and in [trusting] confidence shall be your strength. But you would not,” (Isaiah 30:15 AMP)
Be encouraged, dear sister. He has you, has you in His arms even though cannot feel Him there with you at this time. I found out with hindsight that the darkest place in all creation is in the shadow of His wings.
Love you in the Son,
Michael
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Yes, that is what I always have had in my mind as well, Michael,
“Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.” (Ps 127:1-2 ESV)
And you guessed rightly, I slowly begin to feel and enjoy His rest, wondering why I should write anything, feeling no nudge at all. Actually, that condition is getting more and more pleasant. In fact, today I have eventually begun to feel the presence of Him who protected me under His wings as you so beautifully put it, my dear brother!
Thanks a lot for the encouragement! 🙂
Love you in Him, too,
Susanne
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Michael said:
Susanne, thank you for your reply. It is good to hear that you are more and more at peace with where Father has you and can feel His presence there.
You are in my heart and prayers, dear sister,
Michael
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Michael, you’re most welcome. Yes, I was amazed as I suddenly began to feel Him again. Did not expect it at all… 😉
Thanks a bunch for your prayers. I know that God hears you, my dear brother. ❤
Love,
Susanne
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Planting Potatoes said:
another good read, thank you for blessing us again! 🙂
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Susanne Schuberth (Germany) said:
Thanks so much for edifying me again, dear Mark! Am glad to hear that you have been blessed too. 🙂
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